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| neighbours? gettin to be good friends? fuckin come down to Sunnyvale |
Shay is a foul-mouthed, lanky Aussie girl who decided to go to Twinbrook to meet her email buddy, DeAndre. She liked it there even before she met DeAndre and found a little studio house in the swamp. It was perfect for her as she had enjoyed outdoorsy pursuits when she could be bothered to get away from the TV when she was growing up. Now she could spend her days fishing, gardening and cooking. Shay was from Sydney and loved camping, rock music, cooking shows and of course, Lambo.
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| yeah yeah fuckin calm down you stupid mutt i'll give you a fuckin bikkie later |
The first thing she did was get a leash on Lambo and they went exploring to find things. Lambo was dumb as a post and kept bringing her maple leaves and empty chip packets. She'd work on him a bit more later.
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| errr yuck that's fuckin disgusting Lambo ya stupid mutt, you slobbered on it! |
She really liked what she had seen of Twinbrook so far, it was really old and pretty.
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| What the fuck are you doin Lambo? get out of it! |
As soon as they got home from their nice walk, Lambo decided to start eating the furniture. Shay wasn't too happy about that.
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| gettin real tired of your shit |
After peeing all over the deck then getting fleas, it was bath time for Lambo. He loved being pampered by Shay. He loved the bubbles and the hair dryer.
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| it puts hairs on yer chest sweetheart |
Settling in after her first day in Twinbrook, Shay had a can of some nasty-tasting soup and vowed to learn how to cook so she didn't have to eat that crap again. She watched tv for a while, some stupid Asian cooking show and went to bed dreaming of Hot and Sour Soup.
Lambo was tired from chewing on everything and decided to hop up on the bed and watch over his owner until she fell asleep. Shay slept fitfully, with memories of her first love breaking her heart interrupting her nice dreams. He was the reason she was reluctant to get married. They had been engaged before she came to Twinbrook. He was a jerk though and left her for another girl and made her feel like it was her fault for being such a tomboy. She was mad for a while but usually she always remembered DeAndre's words that those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. They had emailed back and forth for a year and spoke on Skype. He was much older than her but a big kid at heart and it was what made them such great friends.
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| fuckin wet dog smell |
And of course Shay woke to Lambo rolling around in a puddle outside. He smelled pretty feral and she was too lazy to give him a bath so she left him to it.
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It was a really hot day and Shay was glad to see the ice cream truck roll up outside her house.
She was thrilled to see that they sold chocolate Billabong ice creams. It was a nice reminder of her previous life.
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| jesus fucking christ |
After the brain freeze faded, it was time to go inside and get some chores done like playing with Lambo and getting some fishing done, in her pajamas of course.
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| Moby Fuckin Dick, yo |
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| o bby soap me up. |
After Lambo's bath, it was time to go to the park and meet the locals.
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| omg it's Celine Dion and Sarah Jessica Parker! Can i get your autographs? |
It was great to finally meet the locals. First up was a cutie called Nick.
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| Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? |
Sadly, Nick was already married. Shay thought it was wrong to tear apart a happy couple and inappropriate to flirt back anyway since they had just met and didn't know fuck all about each other.
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